Racheting up the tension

As if divorce isn’t hard enough already, here comes Christmas.  And of course the ninety days of legal limbo runs out on or about December 20th.  I am not clear on how fast it could all come together, but it appears that if my wife and I can come to agreement about everything and have signed and filed documents prior to that date, she could get her divorce decree before the holiday.  What a great present!

I think a hundred mean and unkind thoughts over the course of the week.  I manage to bite my tongue on ninety-nine of them.  The one that I speak forth sets us back a week in our work to resolve the un-resolvable.  As odd as it may sound, I would like to get through this part so that I can enjoy the holiday.

I have been looking at life through divorce colored glasses long enough.  I would like to see things from a different perspective.  Every relationship I have will change in some way.  How do I approach parenting after divorce?  How do I approach my need for companionship in a healthy way(is God sufficient)?  How do I approach the Lord as a divorced person(I know that may sound odd, but some will understand).  So many questions.

2 Responses to “Racheting up the tension”

  1. cabsplace Says:

    Ahhh, Signifier,
    I feel your pain. I’ve been there. I’ve had the same questions. I still have them. Actually, the specifics of my situation actually led me to leave the established church for a time (after nearly 20 years in leadership). I’m still struggling with the approach to the Lord as a divorced person. But let me tickle your thought process with this little reality: Rahab is in the geneology of Jesus Christ. Rahab, a harlot! Hmmm, if God himself says sin is sin and he makes no distinction, then is not divorce just as bad as prostitution? And…if God used a prostitute? Does that mean He might also??? Hmmm? Makes you wonder. That’s how I approach the Lord now. As a much more humble being than I was before.
    Thinking of you and yours during this Christmas season.
    Jesus makes it real doesn’t He?
    CAB

  2. Signifier Says:

    Thanks CAB, I have definitely come to a more humble place in the last few months. Real humility that makes it easier to serve when asked. Not the false humility that says I am not good enough.

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